Knowing Boundaries
Source/Author: Mike Murphy, Headmaster
January 31, 2020
It is after 6pm and you have come to school to pick up your child from an after school event and decide that rather than driving around campus you will save a second and go out the entrance. While driving out you are confronted by one of our School Protection Officers who reminds you that the driveways are one-way at all times. Your child is in the car with you. What do you do?
Your child is going to learn a lesson. What would you want to teach at that moment?
Many of us have had the experience of being pulled over by the police for some violation when our children are in the vehicle with us. What lesson do we teach them during these unfortunate moments?
Good people make mistakes. Good people may try to take short cuts that violate rules. What happens when many good people start taking the same shortcut?
Since day one of the opening of the Janet Root Theatre there has been the rule that we do not allow food or drink in the theatre. Janet Root made no exceptions. She did not hesitate to approach any member of the community who accidentally or intentionally violated the rule. Those of us who understand the reason for the rule continue to enforce it. Our theatre is beautiful and maintenance and repair is greatly reduced because of the no food or drinks rule. When people are confronted by staff members for bringing in drinks, their response sends a powerful message to everyone around them. Hopefully, people are being reminded in subtle ways. Yet, others observe these interactions and take note of how community members interact. We realize that we are one of the rare theatres that does not allow food or drinks. We realize that our rule is not top of mind for many of our guests. Yet, no food or drink in the Janet Root Theatre is an honored rule at Shorecrest. What lesson do you want our children to learn when someone is asked to respect the rule?
The most recent issue of High School Today Magazine addresses the ongoing issue of the lack of people willing to become high school referees. The front cover shows a well dressed woman with her finger pointed in the face of a referee. The woman does not look happy. Even before the faceless internet and social media, some really good people determined that the rules of civility do not matter at athletic events. Generations of people have learned that demeaning remarks about referees and players are part of the game. Is that really what we want?
Along with our Core Value of Respect, I believe we share a desire to maintain civility in our homes, school and community. Recently, I received a note from a parent who I had confronted for “taking a short cut” that violated one of our rules. She explained how she used the moment to teach her children the importance of following the rules and respecting the people who try to enforce them. Three Cheers for that parent. Those children saw a side of maturity and civility that we hope children are exposed to every single day. I trust we all strive to do the same.
Cheers!
Mike
